Hey everyone,
I could really use some of your amazing advice. A few years ago, I had a falling out with one of my closest friends, and it still weighs heavily on my heart. We drifted apart after a series of misunderstandings and disagreements about how to handle certain personal issues. It felt like we were speaking different languages, and despite my attempts to talk things through, we both ended up feeling hurt and very misunderstood.
Four years on, I find myself missing her so much. I’ve done a lot of reflecting and have grown since our fallout, and I realise that I really value the friendship we shared. But I’m scared to reach out. What if she doesn’t want to talk? What if the old issues resurface, and we end up arguing with each other again? What is she isn’t receptive to my olive branch?
I want to reconnect and share how I’ve felt about everything, but I don’t know how to approach her without coming off as awkward. Should I send her a message or is it better to wait for a face to face opportunity to meet?
If any of you have been in this situation I would really, really appreciate your advice.
@jellyknowsbest
Hey Jellyknowsbest!
I’ve also been in similar situations where misunderstandings (oftentimes something trivial) has led to a fallout from people who were very close to me. It’s ok to disagree on things- that’s what makes us individuals. And drifting apart is also part of human nature, we don’t always remain close to the same people all throughout our lives.
What’s wonderful is that you have gone through your growth and focussed on yourself and you’ve realised what is important to you. For all you know, the other person would have also gone through that same journey. Time heals us, and we grow through the experiences we have.
Why don’t you draft a message and see how you feel? Reaching out won’t take anything away from you, you’ve only got to gain. And if you feel that you really do want that person in your life, it’s worth extending an olive branch.
If you leave things to chance, it may never come. Seize the opportunity and you may just be happier for it! X
Good afternoon Jellyknowsbest
I know how you feel, I am so stubborn and I was in this exact position a while back. From my experience, I would say that if you’re considering reaching out , take a moment to reflect on what you hope to achieve. Yes there is a chance she may not want, need or entertain a reconciliation but what have you got to lose? If you genuinely miss the friendship and feel ready to mend things, reaching out with kindness and an open heart can be a good step. I had to be prepared for a response that I may not have wanted to hear but in the end reconnecting renewed our bond. Now our friendship is stronger than it was before, I am so glad I reached out and I hope you will be too. Keep us updated! x
Yes – reach out you have nothing to lose! I think reaching out to an old girlfriend can bring back memories and remind you of the closeness you once shared. It’s such a beautiful feeling and will make you feel glad you tried to reach out even if it doesnt work out in the end.
Totally agree! What great advice xx